‘The Pricelessness’ of children. Kids don’t come cheap!
Well, my extremely talented husband has done it again! Writing in his own unique and rhyming style.
Here is his second post for the Up All Hours Blog…..please show him some love…..
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Priceless!
It’s Daddy A here again with my eagerly awaited (So she says!) second post. As you guys know we got married a month ago and despite the generosity of some of our very close friends with the food, venue and booze it still didn’t come in all that cheap! We were about to go on a budget honeymoon when my phone rang and a months work came in. The conversation with my new wife wasn’t a long one as we both agreed we had to sacrifice the sunshine (for the time being at least) and get some money in the bank.
The job has been extended for two weeks and although geographically I’m not too far from home I’m having to spend quite a lot of time away. Work is definitely overrated when you have a new wife and two year old boy at home who you’d much rather be with. As I write this I find myself in the familiar position that many parents find themselves in, where they are having to ‘trade’ for want of a better word, precious time at home with bill paying time at work. There’s an irony to the price you pay for not spending time with your child. You pay the price twice! Kids don’t come cheap…
The Pricelessness Of Baby B
We love you Dude we really do,
There’s nothing we won’t do for you,
And in return you give us joy,
You really are a lovely boy,
But let me run you by some costs,
We’re on hat five, cause four you’ve lost,
And ‘My First Shoes’ by Clarks are awesome,
But if I were you I’d buy with caution,
Built to last the woman said,
I should think so to, there’re 40 quid,
And a happy snap to remember the day,
Cause in three months time they’re on eBay,
But now we know where to spend our penny’s,
Four ninety nine a pair in Henny’s,
Nappies, there’s a minefield there,
When all they need is air, go bare,
Until you push your luck you see,
And cherub wees on your settee,
Brand or not, what do you get?
Is there really nappy etiquette?
Is it frowned upon to go for cheap?
Does it then end up on the nice clean sheets?
We went budget, don’t mind admitting,
For something frankly put he shits in,
Until we got leak after leak,
And his inside leg looked like stained teak,
So we switched to Pampers, it’s the way to go,
Super absorbent and good Velcro,
Never had a spillage since,
I should hope not though, they’re 30 pence,
Then cream and wipes the cost keeps rising,
Overdrawn well, it ain’t surprising,
Food and books and toys and outings,
Soft play, swimming, the bills keep mounting,
Ladybirds and Bumblebees,
Or in other words, the nursery fees,
A grand a month we’re looking at,
And our mortgage isn’t even that,
Milk of Magnesia, medicine box,
Didn’t I mention Chicken Pox,
Two days off school sorry no admission,
Refund? Ha! Check terms/ conditions,
Bank Holiday Mondays and Good Friday too,
Not a teacher in sight but they still charge you,
Bibs and Calpol, cuddly teddies,
Blankets, bedding, car seats, wellies,
Monitors, bottles, beakers, cups,
Armbands, sun cream, scarf and gloves,
Potties, rattles, soothers, crayons,
Mats with letters for them to play on,
Shampoo, sponges, temperature bath mats,
Buckets and spades and extra large sun hats,
A holiday wow, that would be nice,
Two years old, they pay full price,
But in return they don’t stop giving,
Without them, well life’s not worth living,
And when you think it’s all over, and life’s a breeze,
You better hope you’ve saved for their uni fees!
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Love love love this … but oh so true. As a ‘career mum’ (apparently that’s a thing) I really struggle with the balance thing, particularly when all I want is to be at home with my boy. Not sure when I’ll buy something for ‘me’ again. That latest trend. That fab new skincare. All the things I used to rush out and buy after reading reviews. Strange how all of that doesn’t seem to matter anymore when some Supermarket is doing two for one on Pampers 🙂
It is so true, I actually get excited buying things for B, even if it is cream for his bum! Such a strange old game, we work to get him everything he needs but all we want is to be with him. I think the key is to appreciate the balance and not feel guilty about it, I tell myself off when I start to feel guilty! Thanks for taking the time to comment Gemma. x
this is fantastic, thanks for sharing xx
Thanks for commenting Jaime x
Kids are expensive little blighters aren’t they?! Wait til you’ve got three of them, you’ll never go on holiday….cheap or otherwise lol! Fab poem 🙂
Hi Suzanne, I just can’t imagine ever holidaying with 3! Unless I owned an island! 🙂 Thank you for commenting x
Brilliant! So very true too. 🙂
Isn’t it! Pricey little things! Thanks for taking the time to comment Tom
Love it – made me giggle!
I’m glad! Thank you x
This is utterly utterly brilliant – never a truer word spoken in a poem! Thanks for linking to PoCoLo 🙂
Thanks V x
Love the poem!! If you happen to have a Lidl anywhere near you their nappies are really good. Hope you get your holiday soon.
Yes! I have heard good things about the Lidl nappies, think it is time I gave them a go. Thanks x
I hate having to prioritize money. I feel your pain x
It’s a bugger isn’t it 😉 x
That made me laugh then well up a little at the end too! 🙂
Thank you for your kind words x
Amazing poem, and a very funny post. I count my blessings every day that Scotland has free university education. When your gorgeous boy is ready to study, send him to Edinburgh!
I couldn’t agree more that without them life isn’t worth living, I’d give my last penny to see The Boy happy. Great poem, well expressed thoughts! And Pampers really are the best!
Popping over from blogsRus share thread.